Most women have The Thing.
You know, the thing.
The one they always focus on in the mirror.
The one they hope other people won't notice.
That aspect of their appearance they'd most like to do away with.
Fully. Forever. Never to come back.
I bet you already know what your thing is. The common ones I hear from my clients and community are:
"My flabby arms. I wish they wouldn't jiggle."
"My belly. I feel self-conscious in dresses."
Chances are, this thing is draining you. Taking up brain space. Pulling you toward small and away from expansive.
It's potentially even changing how you do life: who you feel comfortable interacting with, how you participate in conversations, how you think about what opportunities -- big and small -- are available to you.
It may be subtle but it's not insignificant.
I know because my thing -- my abs -- used to take over my life.
During the height of my body image and eating disorder, every single time I'd walk into a bathroom or pass a mirror, I'd lift up my shirt to scrutinize my abs. No matter how lean I got, they were never good enough.
...Which meant I spent an incredible amount of energy wishing my abs were different, lamenting that they weren't, and organizing my behavior around trying to transform them.
Such a drain and not an embodiment of the goddess I subconsciously wanted to be.
Today, I'm sharing a tool to help you feel better about your thing.
Because at the end of the day, no one enjoys feeling like their "pooch" -- or their "flabby arms" -- or their "belly" -- holds power over them.
Simple as that.
Here's the practice:
- Get a piece of paper and a pen.
- Sit somewhere quiet where you can be alone.
- Make a list of the physical attributes you love about yourself. Include things that other people often compliment you on.
- Next to each attribute, write why you love it and if applicable, what it lets you do in life. (Ex: "I love my quads because they let me do heavy deadlifts, which make me feel empowered.")
- Notice how you feel about your thing afterwards.
Spoiler alert: I think you'll feel it quietly recede. Fall into context. Seem less glaring.
That's because most of us focus on one insecurity for every handful of things we feel great about. The insecurity takes up all the space.
This pattern happens in all areas: with our bodies, in work situations, in friendships.
That is, until we consciously choose to break the pattern and back that up with action.
Just to be really clear, this practice is not about vesting more power in appearance. It's about training your brain to notice the good, so that the "bad" gets put in its rightful place.
Give the practice a try today. I think it just may change your game.
Love and light,